In her book Mindset: The New Psychology of Success, Carol Dweck talks about the two different types of mindsets people fall into: a growth mindset versus a fixed mindset.
People with a fixed mindset — those who believe that abilities are fixed—are less likely to flourish than those with a growth mindset — those who believe that abilities can be developed.
I think of a growth mindset as being open and willing to try new things without being attached to the outcome. It’s about reaching for goals that stretch you a little, and believing you have the power to change things.
A fixed mindset says you can’t teach an old dog new tricks, but a growth mindset says you can if the dog is willing!
How Your Mindset Affects Your Progress
When you’re trying to change something about your health or your lifestyle, your mindset is one of the most important factors in whether you’re going to succeed.
But health and lifestyle are the areas where I see a fixed mindset emerge most often. If your self-talk says, “I’m not the kind of person who could ever do meal prep” or “I’m not good at working out” — by committing to that narrative about your identity, you cut yourself off from amazing possibility that you could do those things.
A fixed mindset also cuts you off from being able to tolerate failure. If you believe that you failed at something (say, sticking to a new workout plan) because you are innately lazy, unreliable or unfit, it’s going to be extremely hard for you to get back on the wagon. Why even try?
But if you can cultivate a growth mindset, you give yourself space to fail, but that failure is just an indicator that you’re growing and adding to your capabilities.
And you are going to fail — not because you personally are bad at what you’re doing, but because you’re human and failure happens for a whole host of reasons. Having a growth mindset versus a fixed mindset turns this into an opportunity rather than a disappointment.
Your job is to turn up and do the best you can with the resources you have available, and to keep doing that over and over, even if you fail every now and then.
How to Cultivate a Growth Mindset
And even if you realize that you have a fixed mindset right now, there’s good news. You can change it!
This isn’t just some woo-woo positive thinking either.
In his insightful book, The Brain That Changes Itself, Dr. Norman Doidge delves deep into neuroplasticity, or the brain’s ability to rapidly evolve in response to trauma, stimulus or even to our own thoughts.
Your brain can change itself, grow new cells, change its patterns, and you can choose if you want to take advantage of that. That’s so exciting, and means that no matter where you are starting from, you’re not stuck.
Here are some questions you can ask yourself to start that shift:
“What feels possible? Am I open to trying this new thing? What would happen if this thing changed?”
If you can imagine what life might be after this change, you’re more likely to put in the work. It’s important to recognise that what you’re doing takes work, it isn’t easy, and it requires energy.
Remember that it’s not about waking up every day and asking yourself very seriously how you can evolve into a better person, but staying aware of what you’re accepting for yourself and where you could stretch a little further.
This shift is very much tied to mindfulness, and there’s even progress to be made just in noticing that you have a fixed mindset about something.
You don’t have to start working on it immediately, you can just acknowledge that and come back to it when it’s a priority.
Not everything needs action right away — you have to prioritize and you can only put your energy in so many places.
The trick here is to understand why you’re trying to make these changes, to have a firm grasp on the purpose that’s driving all this work (and it is work — it takes sustained effort over time and a lot of perseverance through discomfort and tedium).
If you know that you’re trying to change your eating habits so that you set a healthy example for your kids, that’s going to keep you going.
If you know that you’re trying to stick to a workout routine so that you can look after your aging parents instead of having to put them in care, you’re going to be very deeply motivated.
It doesn’t even have to be such a big reason — just to feel good in your skin and that you are prioritizing your own wellbeing is a powerful driver.
Of course, prioritizing your own wellbeing doesn’t sound like a big deal… but it can be, right?
What to Do When Your Loved Ones Have A Fixed Mindset
It’s hard when people don’t want you to change — they like you as you are, and if you change it means that your dynamic will change.
Even if they don’t make any change themselves, they will be impacted to some degree by your changes. Your decision to eat more veggies doesn’t make anyone else a bad person, but it can make them feel bad anyway.
The key here is communication. If people around you do get upset about the changes you’re making, be clear that you’re making these changes for you. Let them know that it’s not about them and that making a change for yourself doesn’t mean that you’re judging them.
This is not easy. Most of us care a lot about what our loved ones think about us. I know I care deeply what people think, and even though I try really hard to worry less about it, I know I just have to acknowledge it and keep going anyway. Eventually it just comes down to taking a hard look at your own life and understanding what the cost will be if you don’t make this change.
Still, it’s important to be sensitive to how people are responding to you, to use language that’s as non-judgemental as possible and that will ultimately help them to support you — or at least to give you the room to do what you need to do.
In all, developing a growth mindset versus a fixed mindset is about recognizing what’s possible and giving yourself permission to reach for those possibilities.
It’s about choosing to see yourself as a beautiful work in progress, to appreciate how far you’ve come and to look forward to where you’re going.
It’s work, it takes time and energy and discipline, but developing a growth mindset is one of the most empowering and exciting things you can do for yourself.
When you believe that you are capable of change, that you are in control of how your life unfolds — that’s exhilarating and opens up a whole new world of opportunities.
💭 Let’s decide in advance what we fall toward. I’ll go first: This week, I’m locking in two things: bedtime and partner workouts. (1) With bedtime, I’ve set my iPhone downtime every evening so my apps shut off automatically. When it turns off, I turn off and read a book or go to sleep. (2) And with workouts, if someone’s expecting me, I show up. Because I know myself, once the sun’s out (finally!) and the afternoon hits, my motivation disappears…😬 📅 🔒 So I build around that. What do you need to lock-in this week? #accountabilitycoach #healthyhabits #habitchange #allin #itsallconnected #parentinghacks …
🙌 The basics work. The foundational stuff. The unsexy work that most people want to skip. This is what happens when you commit to that. Over the years, I’ve seen it again and again when someone commits to real strength training, fuels their body properly and builds structure around sleep, stress, and recovery… everything shifts. 🔁 Not just the scale. 💪 We get these wins: Energy that lasts past 3pm. Muscle and real strength you can see and feel. Walking into the gym with a plan. Habits that actually stick. 🔒 It’s truly about mastering the fundamentals and hitting them consistently. * * * * * * * #accountabilitycoach #itsallconnected #healthbenefits #wellnessjourney #StayWell #consistencyiskey #allin #athomeworkout #TorontoFitness …
When it comes to building healthy habits, after years of accountability coaching and experience…I can tell you this: Most people burn out because they’re trying to win in the moment. The ones who actually change? They win in advance. Consistency is about systems and structure. You don’t always rise to your intentions. You fall toward your defaults. So the real question is: What are you making automatic? ❓ 🤔 💭 If you’re ready to stop relying on motivation and start building habits that actually hold, DM me HOLD and I’ll send you the (free!) masterclass. 💬 #accountabilitycoach #HabitsThatHold #allin #habitchange #habitchangecoach #BodyRecomposition…
Every once in a while, life hands you a reminder that the point isn’t just getting somewhere. It’s being here while it’s happening.
I spend a lot of my time teaching people how to move forward. How to build structure.How to stay consistent. How to follow through. And I believe deeply in all of those things.
📢 But PSA to all my people coming out of the madness of this month of “Maycember”…
Maybe your next thing “to-do” is remembering to come up for air.
This trip was full of tiny moments I actually remembered to stop and notice. Magnolias blooming. Quiet walks. 🌳 Fresh air. Watching my family together. 💛 Little ordinary moments that somehow become the ones you remember most.
I love discipline, structure, goals and momentum. Truly.
But I also think part of building a meaningful life is learning how to be fully present inside of it while it’s happening.
So if this finds you rushing from one thing to the next today, maybe this is your reminder to pause for a second.
Look up.
Take a breath.
And remember to ask yourself: What’s something beautiful in your life right now that you’ve been moving too quickly to notice? 🤍
Need to share this simple shift I’ve been working on with a client lately because it works. This mantra: “Some and done is better than none.” And THAT’S the shift we`re executing on. Because consistency is not built from perfect weeks. It’s built from still doing something on the messy, busy, low-energy days instead of fully opting out. A shorter workout still counts. A walk still counts. Protein and veggies at one meal still counts. Ten minutes still counts. We tend to think if we can’t do the ideal version, there’s no point. But usually that all-or-nothing mindset is the exact thing interrupting the habit loop in the first place. Some and done keeps you in motion. 🕺 💃 And staying in motion matters a lot more than doing everything perfectly. So please, remember to keep moving 🏃♂️ 🚴 🤸♀️ And if you`re looking for help on how to build that consistent rhythm , I got you. Comment HOLD for the free Habits That Hold masterclass to help you get moving. 💛 #accountabilitycoach #itsallconnected #allin #consistencyiskey #strengthtraining…
This is me, practicing the exact thing I coach my clients through every day. Lucky for me, I get to see this process work in real time, over and over again. 🔄 And I know firsthand that the people who stay consistent usually are not the people with the most motivation or the most perfect plan. They’re the people who make decisions ahead of time.
It’s easy to get caught up in creating the ideal perfect workout plan and routine and menu and meal prep, especially with ChatGPT and Claude at your fingertips. 🤦🏻♀️I’ve definitely gone down those rabbit holes this year and then been too burned out to actually implement the thing.
💪 Sometimes the biggest flex and most supportive thing you can do for yourself is decide ahead of time, while your head is clear and your intentions are still strong. 🤍
It’s about deciding earlier.
This is the work I do every day with people who already know what to do but can’t make it land inside a busy life. And I’ve captured what I’ve learned from helping hundreds build healthy consistent habits.
Comment HOLD below and I’ll send you the free Habits That Hold Masterclass.
I used to think leaving space made me more flexible. But open space fills quickly. Usually they fill with whatever version of you shows up at 4pm on a long day. And that version of me? Well, let`s just say she`s not the most reliable when it comes to making the healthiest ("I know this is good me") choice. This isn’t about wanting it more.� It’s about deciding earlier. When something is booked, declared, or shared out loud, it feels different. It feels steadier. If you keep watching the day quietly go off the rails, you’re not alone in that. 📲 DM me HOLD and I’ll send you the free masterclass on how to Build Habits that Hold. …
Where in your week are you calling something “flexibility” when it’s really just deferral? 😬 Be honest I told myself I’d “fit a workout in.” But by the end of the day, the workout never happened. I see this with clients all the time around workouts, eating habits, sleep, even recovery. The decisions we make early on our coaching calls tend to get protected. The decisions left to “I`ll figure it out later in the week” get negotiated. And usually, the negotiator is tired, overstimulated, convenience-seeking, and surprisingly persuasive. 😎 Trust me, I know. I can debate my way out of almost anything by 8pm. 🧠 The internal debate team usually opens with: “Maybe tomorrow.” “I’ve had a long day.” “I’ll do a longer one later this week.” “I deserve a night off.” The point is not perfection or rigid structure. It’s understanding that “winging it” often creates more stress, not more freedom. 💪 Sometimes the biggest flex and supportive thing you can do for yourself is decide ahead of time, while your head is clear and your intentions are still strong. 🤍 #consistencyiskey #showupforyourself #nomagicpill #healthcoach #strengthtrainingday#personaltrainer #accountabilitypartner #accountabilitypost #accountabilitycoach #accountabilitychallenge # #accountabilityselfie #strengthtrainingforwomen #strengthtrainingwomen…
I recently had an open weekend morning. The kind that almost never happens. I told myself I’d train “sometime between 1 and 4.” Ha. At 10 pm, I sat on the couch and accepted that I’d been outplayed by my own day. It wasn’t a motivation problem. It wasn’t a discipline problem. It was a decision-timing problem. Nothing had been locked in. So the day filled the space I left open. With kids, house errands, last minute grocery runs. And for anyone with long hair, you what I mean when I then say I had to factor in the shower-and-actually-being-presentable tax 😂 So, the following weekend, I did something so basic it ALMOST felt too boring to write about. On the Thursday night, I booked myself in for a 9am gym workout in my calendar. Told a friend I’d meet her there. And reminded my family the day before that I`d be out. It happened. Because there was nothing left to negotiate. This is the break point I see in capable, intelligent, high-functioning people all the time. Healthy intentions don’t survive open windows. Your wellbeing needs structure to hold. If you’re tired of restarting your health every Monday, I actually built a short masterclass to help called Habits that Hold. DM me “HOLD” to get it. * * * #accountabilitycoach #accountabilitypartner #wellnessjourney #allin #accountabilitychallenge #habitchangecoach #healthcoach #trusttheprocess #consistencyiskey #keepshowingup #whatisyourwhy…
If you know me, you know I love eating and I love pretty food. 😋 But this giant bean salad is not just about aesthetics. This is about removing the midday negotiation. If this is prepped and visible, I will grab it, even on an insane day. If it is not, convenience wins. Nine times out of ten, that means something quick and packaged and I end up crashing and craving sugar by late afternoon. This is the consistency gap most smart, busy people miss. It is not knowledge. It is not motivation. It is whether the decision was made before the day got loud. 🙋🏻♀️Question for you: What decision are you still leaving up to your tired self this week? #accountabilitycoach #habitchangecoach #allin #itsallconnected #healthcoachlife…
Five years ago I posted a quote that really struck a chord with people 🎶 . "Choose what you want most over what you want now." I still think it`s a fine sentence. But looking at it now, it feels incomplete. The clients I work with don`t have a wanting problem. They want it. They`ve wanted it for years. What they`re doing at 6am, mid-meeting, on the third night of bad sleep is negotiating with themselves. And every negotiation costs something. A habit that holds takes the negotiation off the table. That`s the whole game. Not more discipline. Less decision-making. So if you`re in the camp of "I already know what to do, I just need to actually do it," my Habits That Hold Masterclass is FREE to access. I built it for my people who want healthy habits and consistency to feel embedded into their life and not something they have to force. 📱 Comment or DM me HOLD to get it right away! #consistencyiskey #mindsetshift #accountabilitypartner #habitchangecoach #healthyhabits #accountabilitycoaching #accountabilitycoach #healthcoach #itsallconnected #allin…
"You can do hard things." I say that to my daughter all the time. And this post was inspired by a conversation I had with a client this week where we were almost laughing at her frustration. Because she can do really hard things. She leads. She carries a lot. She handles pressure well. She also recites this phrase to her kids all the time. And this conversation was such a good reminder that this isn’t about capability. It simply has to fit. If your life is already full, like really full, your habits have to work inside that life. Otherwise it becomes a burst of intensity and then the cycle of burnout and quitting. Most people aren’t failing because they’re incapable. They’re failing because they are trying to build habits that don’t match their actual capacity. (trust me, I`ve seen the calendars working parents, executives and entrepreneurs need to manage 📆 ) Life doesn’t wait for ideal conditions. Your structure can’t either. If you want to understand how to build habits that actually hold up inside a full life, I teach this inside short masterclass. Check it out on my website or DM me “HOLD” and I’ve set it up so it sends straight to you 🤍 #accountabilitycoach #accountabilitypartner #itsallconnected #changeyourmindset #consistencyiskey #habitchangecoach #healthcoach…
Health isn’t just workouts and meal plans. It’s building a life where your body can say yes. I’m less interested in intensity and more interested in capacity. Moments like this build something deeper than toughness. They build regulation. The ability to breathe instead of react. To stay instead of escape. And that carries into everything. Work. Parenting. Hard conversations. Real life. And everything that actually matters. Yes to adventure. Yes to (very) cold water. Yes to feeling capable. That’s the kind of consistency I care about. 💛 thanks for reading x Also, PSA: highly recommend non-slip shoes 🥶 🌲 🧘 #coldplunge #nervoussystemregulation #buildcapacity #itsallconnected #accountabilitycoach #consistencyoverintensity #highperformerhabits #integratedhealth #realisticwellness #healthcoach…
This isn’t a discipline problem. You struggle to stick with healthy habits because they were probably built for ideal conditions. NOT for full calendars, high standards and real life responsibility. I see people try to fix inconsistency with more effort. But effort without structure collapses. That’s exactly why I (finally)created a free masterclass called Habits That Hold. Over the years, I’ve worked with so many capable, intelligent professionals who felt quietly frustrated by the same pattern. Starting strong. Then watching consistency slip when life inevitably gets full. This training is my response to that. Inside, I share: • Why consistency keeps breaking down (even when you know what to do) • What’s actually happening beneath the start–stop cycle • How to build habits that flex with stress, travel and demanding seasons • My Consistency Framework + a guided reflective workbook No extremes. No starting over every Monday. Just habits that hold. If you’d like it, comment HOLD below. I’ve set it up to automatically send the link straight to your DMs so you’ll get it right away. No pressure. Just a smarter way to build consistency that lasts. I’d genuinely love to hear what lands for you. 💛 #itsallconnected #accountabilitycoach #consistencyiskey #mentalwellbeing #allin #accountabilitychallenge #habittracker #habitchange #habitchangecoach #weightlosscoach #trusttheprocess #romewasntbuiltinaday #keepshowingup #whatisyourwhy…
What I’ve learned, and honestly am still practicing, is this: I don’t need more intensity. I need the right proximity. When I put myself in the right room, I stop negotiating. Last year I joined a gym I didn’t technically “need.” I have programs, equipment and enough experience to write my own workouts in my sleep. There was no logical reason to sign up. And still, it made one of the biggest differences in my consistency. I’ve seen the impact compound physically in just 1 year, especially in my endurance. Not because I learned something new, but because I was surrounded by people moving. I finished the last brutal set which, for the record, was more than I would have done alone. And I know that about myself. That shift wasn’t about discipline. It was about environment. When I train at @oneacademylife, I show up differently. The energy, the standards, the people beside you still going, it changes something. Independence is a strength. But the right room is often what makes it sustainable. Grateful for the steady push from @addisonfx @coachbobbyd @oa_jbruce…
These are real check-ins from real clients.🤍 The names are blurred. The wins aren’t. What I love most about these isn’t the results. It’s the moments just before them. The morning someone didn’t feel like it and went anyway. The week that wasn’t perfect but still got done. The check-in where someone realized they’d quietly become a different person. That’s the work. 🔁 Not dramatic. Not overnight. Just consistent, honest effort inside real, busy lives. If you’ve been wondering what it actually looks like to work together, this is it. Link in bio if you’re ready to have a conversation. …
What if peer pressure isn`t the problem? Bear with me, because the answer involves a choir audition. I have always loved singing. It pulls me fully into the present. Quiets the noise. I know it is good for my mood, soul and emotional wellbeing. And yet I had let it slip. Last year I made a quiet commitment to return to it. Which led me to an audition that at first felt more scary than was expecting. I already knew singing was good for me. I wasn`t missing the information. What I was missing was something nudging me back toward it And that is exactly what the right people and the right room did. 🫶🏼 @bettersinging @inkloosivvoiceschoir Sometimes you don`t need less pressure. You need better pressure. 🥰 Full story in these slides. And I`d love to know yours – what`s a room, community or space that has pulled something stronger out of you? 👇…
I’ve been hearing this from many clients this week – people feeling sluggish, stuck or just “meh.” Maybe it’s the season, maybe it’s just life right now. For what it’s worth, here’s the reminder: tiny actions count. They rebuild trust with yourself and get your energy moving again. So if you`re feelin "meh" or like everything is too much (hi, holiday season 👋) REMEMBER that small reps are the fastest way to get back into momentum. You don’t need intensity, you just need something you can follow through on. Think: One slow stretch. Five reps of anything. A 30-second walk. Neck rolls at your desk. Deep, intentional breathing while standing up. 🧘🏽 🫁 🚶🏻♀️🪑 🏋🏽 #itsallconnected #onepercentbetter #accountabilitycoach #accountabilitypartner #allin #habitchange #habitchangecoach #trusttheprocess #consistencyiskey #keepshowingup …
If energy is your currency then muscle is your bank account. I used to think “fitness” meant cardio, yoga, maybe a few light weights.Strength training? That was for athletes – not me. But after more than a decade of coaching adults (and a few humbling moments of my own) I’ve learned this: 👉 Strength training changes everything. I still remember the dreaded high school Presidential Fitness Test: sit-ups, push-ups, the mile run…and that pull-up bar. Our Phys Ed teacher made it clear that our final grade depended on meeting and ranking in every “national fitness standard”. And for girls my age, the standard was actually two pull-ups. The overachiever in me gave it everything but I couldn’t quite get there. The pull-up stood between me and that perfect A+. I got an A-. And I carried that sting for years! lol Fast forward to my 30s: a moment of truth watching my dad (in his 60s!) hop up and bang out three effortless pull-ups after my yoga class in Chiang Mai. That was it. My new goal: one pull-up. Months of training, struggling, almost getting there… until one day, I did it. Then in my 40s I set the goal for two.Then three.And this year? Five. Jet lagged. Traveling. Hotel gym after a hiking trip. Made my husband film it. Five solid pull-ups and the biggest grin! But when the glow wore off and I caught my breath, I realized something important: It was never just about the pull-ups. It’s about what they represent – energy, confidence, resilience and the quiet belief that you can do hard things. 💡 Strong body. Sharp mind. Better decisions. If you’ve been putting strength training off, or wondering how to fit it in without living at the gym, I can help!
Let’s build the kind of strength that changes everything – inside and out. #AccountabilityCoach #itsallconnected #allin #onepercentbetter #consistencyiskey #atomichabits #StrengthTraining #WomenWhoLift #EnergyIsTheNewCurrency #Resilience #FitnessOver40 #PerformanceNotPerfection #StrongNotSorry …
